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Sweet memories
“It’s just that I don’t want to be somebody’s crush. If somebody likes me, I want them to like the real me, not what they think I am. And I don’t want them to carry it around inside. I want them to show me, so I can feel it too.” —The Perks of Being a Wallflower

He was my childhood love. My first love. Every time I watched him from far,my hearts always beat for him. Not until recently did I realize why. I think it’s because our feelings about each other were so innocent that he will always remind me of everlasting childhood. People change. It hurt so much, but something in me will always love him so much. I’ll have a place in my heart for him forever. He’ll always be my love.

I'd be fine with that,
Posted on Thursday, April 25, 2013 at 10:53 PM.

I just want to feel loved. A guy who would really care for me and love me. Someone smart and geeky, someone who would fangirl (or fanguy) over things like Running Man, Watching discovery channel, and other stuff with me. Someone who is funny and casual, that could be my best friend, who is crazy and dorky and weird, but loving and caring and romantic and sweet. 

Is that too much for me to ask? *smirk* 

Never got the chance to talk to you
Posted on at 10:48 PM.

when you see ______ is typing...
and then the backspace...and typing again...and backspace...and typing again...and the final answer is only 3 words long
and you wonder what the heck they were trying to say

Welcome 2013.
Posted on Friday, January 4, 2013 at 6:31 AM.

Hi,now I'm here again. Feelin so damn  ill. I keep on coughing and sneezing, my nose is running like there's no tomorrow and I'm aching from head to toe. Screw this😭 But what to do? I've no choice. Not even close. I really can’t afford to miss school but...ugh. Dah ada orientation gik. Nayyy,I feel like shit you know. Hmm,well to be honest kan...I really hopes that he would care. Even a bit. Tapi sekpalah..I'm just not that kind of girl who deserves anybody. Not even one. For once,I wish I could feel special. In your eyes. Hmmm whatevs lah. Don't wanna talk about it anymore. And I’m simply not motivated anymore. Oh yaaa,by the way. Ezzah masok class 4 sc 2. Oh well,don't you ever remind me..."YANG KAT CLASS YA BANYAK ORG PANDE" except..ME!  I think so. Semua org straight a's. Rasa mcm alien jak lam class ya. Hahaha yeap. Right now,the only thing I MISS OUT was um yea emy padah ada biak baru kat sc3. Hahaahaha mesti handsome nak? *gatal mode is on* Nolahhh kiddin k! Back to the topic,ezzah terpaksa la menghadap muka muka yg popular a.k.a subject popular/YOUWANNAFREAKINDIE SUBJECT HAHAHAHA! BIO-> CHEMIST-> PHYSICS-> ADD MATHS -> MATHS-> BM -> ENG -> ISLAM-> SEJARAH! I'M DYING GUISE! Could you ever imagine on how to manage our time to study all of this? I've no idea you know. Ughhh.

How old is old enough?
Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2012 at 8:05 AM.

People always tell me i am too young to know what love is. how old is old enough? 

is love not the rush you get when he looks your way? the butterflies when his skin brushes yours? or even the pure joy in sharing a laugh and seeing his smile? 
is love not the ache in your heart when you can not be with him? the excitement when you are reunited? or the pleasure in just spending time together?
is love not the idea that you can not live your life without this certain other human? the complete connection between you two? or the feeling of being whole?

so how old is "old enough" to know what love is?
i don't think it matters. if you know, beyond a shred of doubt, that you and another are better as one, that is love. 

undefinable, undeniable, love.

A thousand of happiness!
Posted on Thursday, December 20, 2012 at 9:33 PM.

So hi guys! 2 days ago, ezzah dpt result! Yummy guess what did I dapat??!!! Tadaa! 7A's 1B! ☺☺☺☺ before dapat result ya nak... 9 hours before hari keramat..jeng jeng sekpat tido lalu mata takut lalu mun dpt result teruk sbb I expect 5A camya jak and finalleh the big day had came... Masa masok skolah ya rasa mok lari jak.. Seriously! Double true deh! Haha and bapa haziq kat dpn aku masa ambik result! Guess what??!! Haziq dpt straight A's yohh nervous gila babi masa turn aku ya hanya tuhan yg tahu and tadaaa cikgu richard berik slip and I dapat 7A's 1b for my pmr :) hehe I'm so happeh to the max cause I never expect that i'll get this kind of result and the only B was Islam so yeah kira straight lahya mueheh im so proud of myself after semua penat lelah aku trbls sik cukup tido.. Tuition siang mlm. Pegi extra class and yeah this is what I deserved! Alhamdulillah ☺ lekak masok lam keta ya on the spot ayah berik $$$$500 hahah booyeah loaded duh its so worth it babe masa pmr ya ayah susah alu mok beli buku ngn aku sbb time form 2&1 dlk aku salu sik polah buku beli jak sik polah then ayah polah spotcheck ohmaigod nya bisak semua buku ya haha so nua jerak la.. Jadi setiap beli buku time pmr ya mesti beli sikit then aku pegi beli kedirik guna my pocket money and now I boleh beli baju and shopping cute stuff sbb dh loaded you hahaha!! Don't be jelly niggah muahaha! And not to forget a thousand of appreciation to all the teachers that had taught me from A to Z! Especially ms.lai huhu nya la yang tolong ezzah a lot in gettin A's in my sc& math subj! If sik tegal nya entah A ka sik both of the scary subject sbb mala jak gagal hasil ezzah work for it and yeah A for math&sc menjadi kenyataan duh! So as a conclusion, if you don't try or work for it and never give insyallah you'll get an excellent result like me. Kinda. Muehehe lotsa love, ezzah! 💋


Having a Coke with You by Frank O’Hara
Posted on Sunday, December 9, 2012 at 1:45 AM.

The first time I heard the poem wad in beastly and I just had to google it! It was so beautiful I had tears in my eyes.
‘I would rather look at you than all the potraits in the world’ .just lovely.
I could marry anyone who reads it to me.  I love it! Well written, & paints such vivid pictures in my mind.

Having a Coke with You
is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt
partly because of the fluorescent orange tulips around the birches
partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary
it is hard to believe when I’m with you that there can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it
in the warm New York 4 o’clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles
and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them
I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it’s in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven’t gone to yet so we can go together the first time
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or
at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me
and what good does all the research of the Impressionists do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn’t pick the rider as carefully
as the horse
it seems they were all cheated of some marvelous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it
Frank O’Hara


Just Quotes.
Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2012 at 7:59 PM.

It really BREAKS my heart when I remember this story! 

“I don’t regret a thing that I met you… That I fell in love with you. If I were to meet you again, even knowing such sadness awaits me, I’d definitely fall in love with you again.”
 Mayu Taneda (I Give My First Love to You)

Words of wisdom.
Posted on Wednesday, November 14, 2012 at 7:35 AM.

My favourite quotes :) 

Just Quote.
Posted on Sunday, October 28, 2012 at 1:50 AM.